Personal testimony about the process of trauma treatment. The feelings of loss and insignificance are the realities of our everyday lives. There are some unprocessed emotions that need their space and reason. How does the personal artwork becomes political? What is depoliticizes it? What is our relationship with pain and our own body in context of accepting ourselves? Is it possible to transform pain into a positive signal of being alive? In it possible to breathe to self-consciousness? To experience a trauma again intentionally can help with letting go however it often remains not solved by society. Recasting of emotional and mental material from apathy and resignation to a hidden intimate confession and call for a change of society and a collective transformation of shame to pride, anger to strength and pain to sympathy.